Hearing the cries...

Yesterday afternoon we went by motorbike with the receptionist from our hotel to meet a very poor family in a little village nearby. This plan developed spontaneously because the receptionist knows our guide Anh and his reputation for helping people.

The information we have about the family before we arrive is that the parents are both disabled and the father cannot walk or stand. They have 2 children, a daughter who is 20 and described as "having problems."  They also have an 8 year old son who attends school. When he's not in school the parents send him to the local market place to beg for money to buy food so the family can eat. At this point he is their only hope.

When we arrive the boy is waiting by the side of the road. He leads us back the dirt path to his home.  His mother is chopping firewood for cooking and his father is sitting on the floor of the porch. We're invited in. There is no furniture in the small 3 room home, the only food is a little rice and some fish sauce. There is a blanket on the floor.

Quiet Vietnamese chatter occurs between the couple, the boy, Anh and the receptionist. We get back on the motor bikes with the boy and head to a nearby market. Anh purchases eggs, tofu, oil, and a tomato, and juice.

Back on the bikes, we return to the path that leads to the home where we drop the boy off with the bags of groceries. He is strong enough to carry them all! He takes a few steps toward home then stops, turns around, and smiles.

With heavy hearts we pull away.

This morning Tonya suggested that maybe Jim Helt heard the boy's cries, and that's what set this series of events in motion! A portion of Jim's gifts for Vietnam will help sustain the family for the next year or until other arrangements are in place.

Oasis of Love - Duc Son Orphanage

The adventures of fulfilling the wishes of Jim Helt in Vietnam have begun! (Read previous post for the backstory). There are 3 of us traveling together, my dear friend Tonya Mayes, our amazing guide and friend Vu Duc Anh and me. And after just 3 days it's clear that while it might appear that we're the ones bringing gifts, a closer look reveals the timeless truth....that in giving, we recieve! The radical hospitality of the Vietnamese people often leaves our hearts full, our eyes watery, and our voices speachless. It's impossible to share it all, but I hope to post a few short recaps of Jim's gifts and the impact they have...on all of us.

Hue is a city of contrast, steeped in the gentle richness of Buddhaism, and also the site of one of the longest and fiercest battles during the American war. The geographic location of Hue makes it a prime target of typhoons and severe flooding, which happen almost annually. Poverty is prevalent, and as a result, children often bear the toll. 

Yesterday we visited the Duc Son orphanage run by Buddhist nuns. Sister Minh Tu heads the family of 130 children! Their ages range from 2 months to 22 years. It's a home, where the primary house rule is Love! There's a firm, yet gentle structure which helps create an air of peaceful playfulness.

Minh Tu is a kind, fearless and progressive advocate for the children. She recently raised money for an in ground pool so that the children can learn to swim. Many of the children lost homes and families to severe flooding, and she believes knowing how to swim helps them conquer fear and could perhaps save their lives during future flooding. And with a wink she said "it also helps keep them out of trouble!" She also arranged to rent a  nearby farm where the children raise their own organic vegetables.

The children were joyful, and the love palpable. While speaking with a beautiful 22 year old woman who has lived there since she was 2 days old, I said "you have a very big family" she smiled and said "yes, many brothers and many sisters" and then she pointed to Sister Minh Tu and said "Mother!"

We were there to meet the kids and to present food and baby formula which had been purchased on
behalf of Jim. When we arrived the children were seated at long rows of tables ready to enjoy a meal also provided by Jim. But before they ate they put their hands together in prayer position and chanted a prayer in unison, thanking Jim Helt for his gift of love. Minh Tu assured us that Jim's spirit will remain there.

Those of you who knew Jim, know that there's no place Jim would rather be....then in the presence of children!

Honoring Jim Helt

Tribute to an EXTRAordinary life….

I first met Jim 11 years ago when he flew to Albany NY from his home in San Francisco to attend a veteran healing retreat. I felt an immediate connection to Jim, and within 10 minutes of our meeting he was wearing my belt to keep his pants up because he'd left his at the security check point in SF. And within the first 24 hours I recognized him as a “keeper”, someone I always wanted to have in my life. 

So much about Jim intrigued me…… His slow peaceful mannerisms and effortless belly laugh, his sharing of early personal struggles to reconcile being born gay and Catholic in the 1940's, his 8 years of service as an Officer in the US Air Force, his activism in the peace movement after returning from Viet Nam, his time as a Theology student and Franciscan brother, his extensive travels around the world with a sleeping bag and back pack living and working among the poor, his life long commitment to living simply, while making a living as a CPA, and how, when he felt happy he’d play music and dance…alone in the living room of his little bungalow.

Jim modeled humility, with no hint of arrogance or self serving motives. His deep appreciation for all people was palpable. He had a magical knack of making connections and engaging people in a way that left them believing they were the most important person on the planet. What fun it was to watch him spread his infectious and extraordinary kindness in the most ordinary places. 

Jim had a deep love for Viet Nam. He spoke openly of his sadness about the atrocities inflicted on that country and it’s people during the American war, of which he was a part. He returned to Viet Nam four times since the war and has many dear friends there, men women and children whom he considered his family. Through the years he’s made a wholehearted investment in those relationships. He's also given consistently and generously to assist those in need, especially to the children. 

Several years ago Jim began to speak with me about his wishes that after his death his entire estate go to help the less fortunate in Viet Nam and he asked that I oversee that process. At first I responded with “of course I will” but found myself not wanting to really talk about it, mainly because that would mean facing the reality of his passing. But as Jim’s health began to decline, I knew it was time to honor his wishes and dive into the deep and often difficult discussions about his desires for the disbursement of his life savings in the country and among the people he so loved.

I was in awe of the way Jim spoke openly and optimistically about his impending death, and how he moved through the process with grace and ease. I remember asking if he was afraid to die and he literally laughed out loud and said “Oh no, no, no I actually feel joy about it”. And as unusual as that concept felt to me, I believed him! He was at peace with the way he'd lived and loved!

In his final months, Jim declined medical treatment. He felt he'd lived long enough and wanted. his resoucres to help improve the quality of lives of people in Viet Nam rather then to keep him alive. 

Jim passed on Dec. 22, 2016 at the age of 76. Since that time a portion of his gifts have helped finance a water system of a hill tribe village, providing clean water for daily use. He also provided food and funding for families near the city of Hue who experienced flooding due to a typhoon and scholarship money for young people to attend school. 

I'll return to Viet Nam this March to continue to help fulfill Jim's legacy that even in death EXTRAordinary Love out lives the cesation of breath. 

Deep gratitude to Jim's many friends, especially his EGG group whose friendship sustained him for many years, namely Bill, Scott, Norman and Paul, to his veteran writing group, and to Bob who made himself available for whatever Jim needed near the end, to his Vietnamese friends and their families, Song, Ha and Son, to the children of Vietnam who lit up his life. To Al a fellow veteran and spiritual seeker, and to Bill, John, CORE Vietnam, Tonya and Anh for their partnership in helping to fulfill Jim's deepest wishes through the James P Helt Fund.

And thank you Jim, for modeling extraordinary Love!